4 Reasons You Must Be Happy Alone Before Being In a Relationship

Have you ever heard the phrase, “Happiness is best when shared"? This is a saying that may be true, but it’s definitely missing some very important prior knowledge. Yes, being happy is great when shared between two or many other people, but more importantly, happiness is fantastic when created with just yourself. 

It’s not as easy as it may sound, though. Being able to find happiness from just yourself is a learned skill, which is why it may be best to give yourself an adequate amount of alone time before embarking on a new relationship.

 You have to be comfortable with just yourself as company before you can find true happiness in any relationship. It takes the work of you alone to bring the most happiness into a dynamic and here are four reasons why:

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1. Company Brings Temporary Happiness 

   
   

If you’re not able to find comfort or contentment in your own company, can you ever really expect to find it just by being in someone else’s? Yes, shared company can always lift your spirits, but only temporarily. If you’re unhappy because of a personal struggle, being with someone else will not void your internal issues. 

Being in a relationship definitely does bring happiness. There is nothing better than falling in love or feeling like you’re on the right track with someone else. However, while the level of happiness in the relationship may be thriving, your own personal happiness may not be. 

2. Alone Time Is The Best Time

   
   

I know I’m always talking about this, but I swear that being alone with yourself becomes a legitimate gift. Once you stop fearing the idea of loneliness, you start embracing it. 

You will get excited to binge-watch Netflix, alone. You will be excited to fall asleep, alone. (Think of all that extra room and no one can steal the blankets!) You like grabbing coffee, alone. Being alone will become a habit, and an excellent one at that. You’ll begin to realize that you’ve always had yourself for company, so you’ve never really been by yourself. 

3. Understanding Yourself Leads To Independence

The more comfortable you become being by yourself, the more independent you start to feel. It’s so easy to become consumed by the idea of always having someone else when you’re in a relationship. You always have someone there to reinforce and encourage you in times of weakness, but what if one day you didn’t have them anymore? 

You must become your own source of motivation and inspiration because as great as it is to have your own personal cheerleader, we must first rely on ourselves. Someone else’s kind words will never mean much unless we truly believe them, too. 

Once we perfect the concept of being alone, we feel unstoppable. It will feel like there’s nothing you can’t handle by yourself. You’ll feel secure with just yourself, and while this isn’t the goal, this is an incredibly attractive quality to have. People are drawn to those who are most confident in themselves. 

4. Your Relationship Will Be More Successful

If you’re already extremely happy alone, can you imagine how great the relationship is going to be? You’re not relying on someone else to make you happy. You both are bringing equal amounts of happiness into the relationship rather than just one person giving more than the other. 

If you’re content alone, you’ll feel a deeper sense of security when you’re not with your partner. If you were initially relying on someone to make you feel good, how would it feel when they had other plans or a prior obligation? If you’re anything like me, you probably weren’t feeling your best.  If you rely on someone else to make you feel good, when they leave, you stop feeling those happy emotions. You revert, and begin to feel lonely again. 

You truly can and are your own source of happiness, and even though it may seem like we need to rely on others to make us feel our best, we really don’t. We have the power to keep ourselves company and make ourselves happy. Focus on you first and a relationship, second.